It's Okay
by Michaela.Lala
Summary: AU. Dean lied the whole time. He just didn't want to be tossed away.


"Dad! Listen, I'm sorry I never introduced you to him before, but we only met a couple days ago! It was just a kiss!" Dean frantically tried to explain to his father just what he'd walked in on.

"What?" Sam stood from his seat on the motel bed. "Dean, what's going on?"

John Winchester spun on his heel and halted his teenaged son in his tracks, searching him like a hawk would his prey. Dean cringed. "I'm waiting," John growled.

"What do you want me to say?" Dean's voice was small.

"Is this about Isaiah?" Sam stepped up next to his brother, asking quietly. Dean didn't get a chance to answer.

"Damn right it's about _Isaiah_" John mocked the name. "Did you know your brother was with a _boy_?"

"Yeah, Dad, I did," Sam took a step in front of Dean protectively. "What's your problem?"

"He was with a _boy_, Sam!" He gestured angrily to his older son and turned to him. "So what, you're _gay_ now?"

"I, uh," Dean stumbled.

"Why is this such a big deal to you? So what if he's gay!" Sam's voice lifted to a yell. Veins emerged from his neck.

"No son of _mine _is _gay_!" John roared back. Silence fell in the motel room. They ignored the sounds of neighbors banging on the walls for them to be quiet. Sam and John stared each other down, waiting for one to relent. It was at least a minute before the silence was broken.

"Stop it, both of you," Dean said quietly and stepped between them. He gave Sam a weak smirk and lifted his chin to his dad. "I'm sorry. This won't happen again."  
XXXXXXXXXX

"Dean," a soft voice roused him from his dream. It left him with a foul metaphorical residue in his mind; a feeling he wanted to shake. He flickered his eyes open to the dim orangey tint of late afternoon seeping through the windows. His eyes eventually met those of a rather… appealing blonde with a little bit of red lipstick still staining her lips. Her cheek twitched in a smile and she slid her hand over his abdomen.

Right. He'd gotten hammered last night.

"Hey," his throat was a bit sore from disuse. "What time is it?"

"I don't know," she smiled seductively. "I lost track." She pressed her lips to his jaw. He pulled back with a bit of an eyeroll and stood. He replaced his boxers and his pants, and went straight to his phone. Six missed calls, five from Sam, and one from Castiel.

"I have to go," he said to the lady in the bed, still trying to seduce him with a mischievous smile. He leaned down to grab his t-shirt, and tugged it on. He stuck his phone and his wallet—minus about fifty dollars—into his pockets. He tossed the money on the bed and made his way outside.

He drove himself back to the motel, where Sam was talking to Cas, trying to get him to look for Dean. The older brother walked in, grinned, and shut the door behind him.

"Dean, where were you? We've been looking everywhere," Sam stood from his chair.

"Went to a bar, got… _really drunk. _ Missed your calls," he told them, making eye contact with Cas in a silent apology.

"So you were with a girl then?"

"What are you, my nanny?" Dean scoffed.

"No, I just thought you were _gay._"

Dean froze. He turned to Sam and looked him in the eye for a moment.

"No. I got over that phase forever ago," he put the room key on top of his brother's laptop. "Now that I know what you were calling about, what did you want Cas?" They both turned toward the angel, only to find that he was gone.

"He was just making sure you were okay," Sam said quietly. "He was worried too."  
XXXXXXXXXX

"Dean!"

"One sec, Bobby!"

"Boy, if you don't get in here right now, I'm makin' you go to the store for more beer!"

Dean was downstairs in a flash.

"What is it?" he asked.

"Sam told me something that I wanted to address," Bobby wheeled himself behind his desk.

"Oh God, what now?" Dean groaned and plopped himself onto the sofa.

"Don't gimme that. I'm trying to have a serious conversation."

"Alright. What is it?" Dean repeated.

"I know you're gay," Bobby stated clearly. Dean hid his surprise and his bit of fear. He kept his head down, waiting for the words he knew were coming next.

"Dean. It's okay."

Those words stopped his heart. He couldn't move, couldn't speak. After a moment of total shock, he just started trembling. Another minute, and he finally replied.

"I'm really not."

"You're shit at hiding it," Bobby's mouth twitched at the corners. Dean kept looking at the nails in the floorboards as the rumble of Bobby's wheelchair approached him. And then he was wrapped in a hug. Bobby embraced his almost-son and kept him there, comforting him, proving to him that he wouldn't be going anywhere.

"I said it a long time ago," Sam stepped into the room and leaned against the threshold. "So what if you're gay? You're still my brother."

Bobby released Dean and wheeled backward a little to make room for Dean. The man stood, taking the two steps required to cross the room, and pulled his little brother into a hug, eyes burning.

"I knew as well," they all jumped to see Castiel, who had been there for who-knows-how-long. "And in any case, I have no preference in sexual orientation. You have no reason to be wary."

Slowly, Dean released Sam. After a moment of though, he figured it would be harmless to hug the angel now. So he approached Castiel, standing in front of him so he'd register that an embrace was coming. They locked eyes in a moment of hesitation, far too intimate to be innocent. Dean broke the moment and wrapped his arms around the shorter man's shoulders, and stood there awkwardly while Cas figured out what was going on. The angel returned the hug, running a hand through Dean's hair. Then he was gone.

Behind Dean, Bobby and Sam exchanged a proud look.  
XXXXXXXXXX

Crickets chirped not too far away. Dean closed his eyes and listened, soaking in the warm, slightly humid, night air. Nights like this were good, but tonight was better; a heavy weight that he was finally accustomed to had been lifted off his chest. He settled comfortably into the ridges of the Impala's hood.

"Hello, Dean." For once, Dean didn't react to the sudden appearance of the angel.

"Hey, Cas."

"Uh," Castiel articulated. "How are you?"

"Pretty great, actually. Here, come sit with me, man."

"But you are lying down."

Dean sighed heavily and sat up. "Now come sit with me."

"If you wish," Cas sat himself next to Dean, legs touching because of the lack of space. Dean was suddenly very aware of his own body heat.

"Hey, Cas," Dean started, clearing his throat. "Thank you."

"You are welcome," Cas replied immediately. "…What are you thanking me for?"

"Not turning me away, I guess," Dean chuckled lightly. "I'm glad I still have you."

"It isn't a problem. Nor is it something to thank me for. I've always been indifferent toward sexual orientation. It's not something we have in heaven."

Dean looked at him. "What do you mean?"

"There aren't homosexual angels, Dean. Just… angels. We are attracted to whomever we're attracted to," Cas met Dean's gaze. Dean stiffened as Castiel leaned forward and touched a light kiss to his prickly cheek. Cas turned away immediately and stared back up at the sky obliviously, as Dean kept staring him down; his cheeks were burning.

The hood of the car made a loud banging noise as Dean pulled Cas to him, pressing their lips together. Cas seemed _very _lost for a second, but very soon he was cradling Dean's face with just as much passion as Dean. As they pulled apart for air, Dean held Cas close. He gripped the back of his neck, kept Cas's face buried in his neck.

"Thank you," Dean whispered almost silently.


End file.
